Nerd Matt is Nerdy

Shake Me

Mon, 25 Feb 2013 16:02:00 -0500

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

Rigid and unmoving,

like a statue protruding,

from history.

Far from unyielding,

My life keeps shifting,

Beneath my feet.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

She heard

And remembered

Ligthly tempered

To redundancy.

The forces

Causing

Oscillating and Pausing

Leaves dust of me.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

Shake Me,

No, sway to see

Just bend and break me.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

Its Siesmic,

An Epic

Moment

Period.

"“No way. Nobody cuts their crotch hair.” -My Mother"

Mon, 07 Jan 2013 21:17:48 -0500

“

“No way. Nobody cuts their crotch hair.”

-My Mother

”

Get your daily laughgasm here for FREE!!!

Mon, 17 Dec 2012 05:23:41 -0500

Get your daily laughgasm here for FREE!!!

Photo

Mon, 17 Dec 2012 05:10:39 -0500

Non-Traditional Facebook Birthday post.

Mon, 03 Dec 2012 16:29:31 -0500

My wonderful friend Megan went with a little less traditional “Happy Birthday” post. This is what she had to say:

OMMFG IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND YOU CAME OUT OF A UTERUS AND I’M REALLY GLAD YOU DID BECAUSE YOU ARE MY FAVORITE MALE ALASKAN AND OMFG I JUST LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND HOPE THIS DAY IS EFFING AWESOME.

MATTIE, YOU ARE COOL AND OH GOD I HOPE THIS BIRTHDAY BLOWS YOUR MIND LIKE YOUR DAY OF BIRTH PROBABLY DID EXCEPT IN MORE OF AN “AMAZING” FACTOR RATHER THAN “HOLY EFF I’M NO LONGER FLOATING IN AMNIOTIC FLUID AND THIS OXYGEN IS LEGIT” FACTOR

ERMAGERSH!

most-awkward-moments: Get your daily laughgasm here for...

Mon, 03 Dec 2012 16:24:35 -0500

most-awkward-moments:

Get your daily laughgasm here for FREE!!!

Oh MR. Turner…

Faust world problems.

Wed, 24 Oct 2012 16:58:40 -0400

Faust world problems.

Okay one more. Its quite different from my last post, however...

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 18:34:59 -0400

Okay one more. Its quite different from my last post, however same girl. This is ART at its finest.

This chick is one of my new favorites.

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 18:24:00 -0400

This chick is one of my new favorites.

Warning: this blog will give you a laugh-attack. In...

Tue, 31 Jul 2012 22:56:11 -0400

Warning: this blog will give you a laugh-attack.

In Avril’s defense she did ask if she could be any more obvious.

You deserve to smile, and this blog will help you get what you...

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 01:36:04 -0400

You deserve to smile, and this blog will help you get what you deserve.

lol-gpoy: Follow lol-gpoy for moments you can relate to! Me...

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 00:59:27 -0400

lol-gpoy:

Follow lol-gpoy for moments you can relate to!

Me and Bub for sure.

I love me some Smoulders.

Tue, 22 May 2012 00:27:17 -0400

I love me some Smoulders.

FML

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:46:24 -0400

FML

Red Bull delivered a crate right outside of my eight AM lecture....

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 13:45:23 -0400

Red Bull delivered a crate right outside of my eight AM lecture. WOOT!

ThisIsMattsLife

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 00:35:10 -0400

Have you ever gotten really into a tv show that is old and were frusterated because you found that you cant talk about it with anyone? Let me explain. I have just started watching “freaks and geeks” and it’s awesome. I never even knew it existed and now nobody is on the same as I am when I tell inside jokes from the show as if it is a relevant tv show. Oh internet look what you’ve done.

9 week old Corgi made my day.

Thu, 19 Apr 2012 19:21:16 -0400

9 week old Corgi made my day.

I’m in the middle of MockingJay. These books are so good...

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 03:38:20 -0500

I’m in the middle of MockingJay. These books are so good :D

reblog if you dont have a bra on.

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 03:27:46 -0500

just for you roomy

if my son is gay (for Sarah)

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 03:50:59 -0500

son: mom... i'm gay
me: what was that?
son: i'm... gay
me: HA! KNEW IT!
son: wh...what?
husband: what's going on?
me: OUR SON'S GAY!
husband: oh god.
son: wait, is that okay?
husband: no, i mean yes, it's definitely okay, just, er... your mother...
me: ARE YOU DATING ANYONE?
son: i—
me: YOU CAN DATE WHOMEVER YOU WANT
son: that's great mom bu—
me: I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
husband: your mother has this thing about ga—
me: I'M GOING TO BAKE YOU A CAKE
son: mom that really isn—
me: HAVE YOU EVER SEEN GLEE? HAVE I EVER SHOWN IT TO YOU?
husband: shit
me: WHAT ABOUT X-MEN?
son: dad, what's going o—
me: WE ARE GOING TO STAY UP LATE AND TALK ABOUT BOYS
husband: walk away slowly son i'll try to handle your moth—
me: YOU CAN HAVE AS MANY SLEEPOVERS AS YOU WANT WITH BOYS OR GIRLS AS LONG AS IF IT'S BOYS THEY'RE CUTE
son: i'm scared
husband: it's okay. i was worried that this was going to happen
me: I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS FOR SO LONG